I walk this earth with lineage from European settlers who were Irish, German, and Spanish. I also have Native American blood in my DNA. I have lived in multiple states across the United States and seen differences in socially acceptable norms around racism and oppression in every corner of this country. Lately, I’ve found myself enraged, saddened, perplexed, curious, and frustrated by my role in systemic racism, and also wondering what I can do to be a better ally for people of color. I check the box of “caucasian” when asked about my race, and have experienced gender discrimination, while also privilege my entire life… mostly privilege from the perspective of the neighborhoods I’ve lived in, the schools I’ve attended, the jobs I’ve landed, and the promotions I’ve received. This doesn’t even tackle the sense of safety I feel when jogging down streets, walking into convenient stores at night, or talking about topics that are potentially triggering.  

Bias is real, and I admit I’m aware of some of it from my upbringing and societal influences. I’ve also enjoyed learning more from Harvards’s study Project Implicit. I am not naive, and I understand how much bias is implicit and invisible to me. I am guilty of thinking “I don’t see color” or “I’m not like them” referring to white supremist groups, yet, when it comes to heated conversations about race, I have remained in my bubble of privilege, not wanting to rock the boat, or deferring to the intention of wanting all viewpoints to feel heard and valid. I’ve changed this view and pledge to increase my involvement in the anti-racism fight.

In her book, White Fragility and Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk About Race, Robin DiAngelo makes a poignant comparison of systemic racism to a pier. The pier may appear to be floating above the lake or ocean floor, but we know it’s not. There is an entire structure under the water, anchored into the foundation of the ocean or lake floor beneath. Yes, slavery ended in 1865, but outcomes for equity have not been realized in our country or in our community. Racism is real. Today, in 2020, it’s time to rock the boat.

DiAngelo explains white people in North America are often insulated from racial stress, consciously or subconsciously feeling entitled to and deserving of advantages based on working hard, meritocracy, or not feeling part of the problem. When topics of race arise, it is common to emit defensive responses or move to silence, withdrawal, or anger, hiding behind the notion that I am a “good, moral person.” And yet, we continue to live in a society where white control exists and equity actions are not taken. When we refuse to acknowledge any advantage to being white, we continue to invest in a system that separates. We won’t get to where we need to go from a place of white comfort. We don’t need to continue feeding the systems of racism, and it’s time we get ready for sustained study, struggle, and focus. The system we’re in and not an event.

As much as I was raised to treat others with respect and not see color, race, religious beliefs, or sexual preferences as good or bad, I also recognize I was raised racially illiterate. I want to better understand the dynamics of racism and how it impacts people of color differently than it impacts myself. We bring our history with us, and we can’t assume everyone is having our same experience. Apathy about racial injustice is just as harmful as wanting to jump over the hard, personal work and jump to solutions. We’ve got to do the inner work.

At one of the Black Lives Matters local marches, one sign that stood out to me was: “I will never truly understand what it’s like to stand in your shoes. And know, I stand with you.” I am an active proponent of interrupting bias and prejudice, and ready, as I stumble forward, to not only interrupt, but also intervene as a stronger ally for black and indigenous people of color. I move forward with a pledge for action, aware that the path will be unclear, rocky, and emotionally charged. I will keep these things in mind as I pledge to stand up for changes that chisel away at the foundation of racism beneath my feet. What I know to be true on this journey:

• Discomfort will happen.
• Implicit bias exists.
• Curiosity and humility are a good place to start.
• I will ask, “What has allowed me to remain ignorant about my part in racism?”
• My learning will never be finished.
• It’s time to interrupt systemic racism, and I have a vital part to play.

Therefore, my pledge is as follows, and I invite my brothers and sisters of this community to hold me accountable, and join me in the fight against systemic racism. I do believe “No lives will truly matter until Black Lives Matter.”

Pledge of Allyship From a Place of Privilege

• I WILL do my own inner work to identify and dissolve racial bias in my own thoughts, words, and actions.
• I WILL discourage racial prejudice by others when I witness it.
• I WILL treat all people with dignity and respect, and am open to public feedback when I am not walking my talk.
• I WILL commit to working with others to be part of the solution that treats people of all races, ethnicities, and cultures with justice, equity, and compassion.
• I WILL maintain allegiance to this pledge for the betterment of my community and future generations. The time is now.

In the words of Austin Channing Brown from a recent Unlocking Us podcast with Brene Brown, “The work of anti-racism is becoming a better human to all humans.” I’m in.