The new year offers us a symbolic fresh start. We make resolutions, set our intentions, and vow to let go of the things that didn’t serve us last year. The notion of getting to start fresh is so powerful that each year, we approach it with great ritual and celebration. But, what if we lived our regular lives with the belief that we could always start anew? It would certainly allow us to see that our personalities are less fixed than we believe them to be. And, it would allow us to live with more compassion in our hearts – for ourselves and others. The benefits seem clear. So, how do we get there? These three teachings serve as guideposts for nurturing the practice of renewal:

Lesson #1: “Begin again.” –Sharon Salzberg

Sharon Salzberg teaches her students to “begin again” in meditation practice. It’s inevitable that we will stray. In our practice, our thoughts will wander – we will plan for the future or regret the past – but the magic is not in never leaving; it’s in the return. Coming back to our breath and feeling our body sensations remind us that we are home again. It’s the same with how we live. Life will knock us off balance and we will lose sight of who we are by reacting, shaming ourselves, blaming others, self-medicating, compulsively shopping, procrastinating, gossiping, and on and on and on. When we discover ourselves in a bad habit, it’s easy to think, “This is just who I am.” But, those are the times we need to challenge such self-limiting beliefs, take a breath, and begin again. In the next breath, you could choose to say something nice about someone. The breath after that you could apologize; and the breath after that, you could ask for help. Could you try breathing in a new choice right now? Returning to yourself is also known as constancy.

Toddlers taking their first steps stumble and fall. It’s only because they get up again and again (constancy) that they learn to walk.

Lesson #2: “You become like the five people you spend the most time with. Choose carefully.” –Jim Rohn

If we want to remain in our spiral, we know exactly who to go to to keep us there. We drink and drug with the regulars. We call and complain to someone who will only stoke the fire. Yet, our inner wisdom also guides us to the people who will lift us up. The next time someone offends you, try calling a friend (or sponsor, therapist, or life coach) who will help de-escalate your feelings and offer you a different perspective. What quality does it add to your life to look for friends who help soothe you rather than encourage your suffering?

Lesson #3: “Do not doubt your own basic goodness. In spite of all confusion and fear, you are born with a heart that knows what is just, loving, and beautiful.” –Jack Kornfield

The Buddhist concept of basic goodness invites us to see ourselves as complete beings. Through this lens, we have the potential to quell the negative self-talk and, instead, choose love. Zen teacher Thich Nhat Hanh encourages us to work with our habit patterns, such as anger and reactivity, as though they are a crying baby. Pick up your habit pattern, hold it, and ask it what it needs. It could be as simple as self-validation, “What you are going through is really hard.” Through this technique of basic attention, we are able to let go of the judgment of ourselves and love the inner child who is always there.

The possibility to renew ourselves is always available to us. When we renew ourselves as a practice, it invites limitless potential for growth, love, and connection – all year long.